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Thread: Arse Cup

  1. #1
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    Is it about time for this again? DIVER? Relkeel? Anyone else who wants to organise it?

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    I'm afraid there is not enough competition, Paul.

    Thommo still rules.
    Ah! but a man's reach should exceed his grasp......

  3. #3
    Senior Member Shadow Leader's Avatar
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    Oh, I don't know - Matt Chapman is well ahead of the handicapper at his present rate of improvement!
    Moderation is a fatal thing. Nothing succeeds like excess.

    False face must hide what the false heart doth know.

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    Matt Chapman's not even in the same class as Carson, he can't even be considered to achieved the levels that Thomo regularly rides to. This competition needs putting in to categories

    Arse of the year or Golden Arse
    Most promising new arse
    Terrestial Tele Arse
    Print Journo Arse
    Life time achievement Arse - (actually that's Thomo again)
    Arse moment of the year
    What about a female arse comp, all the 'stellar arses' are men
    Don't be so gloomy. After all it's not that awful. Like the fella says, in Italy for 30 years under the Borgias they had warfare, terror, murder, and bloodshed, but they produced Michelangelo, Leonardo da Vinci, and the Renaissance. In Switzerland they had brotherly love - they had 500 years of democracy and peace, and what did that produce? The cuckoo clock. So long Holly. _ Harry Limes

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    Senior Member Shadow Leader's Avatar
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    I think Matt's catching up fast - in fact I'd nearly go so far as to say he's edging past Carson. Then again that may be as Carson is only on the screens once a week whereas I have to suffer that baboon Chapman most days!
    Moderation is a fatal thing. Nothing succeeds like excess.

    False face must hide what the false heart doth know.

  6. #6
    Senior Member an capall's Avatar
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    Carson is Sea Bird. Thommo is only Benny The Dip.

    Get real all of you.
    "And still they gazed and still the wonder grew. That one small head could carry all he knew.

    And that small head knew that Impaire Et Passe would win the Champion Hurdle."

  7. #7
    Senior Member rorydelargy's Avatar
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    Wrong An Capall,

    Thommo is Snaafi Dancer ~ Carson is merely Killer Instinct.
    handsome is as handsome does

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    Super Moderator Irish Stamp's Avatar
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    Any chance of say a Novembarse handicap?
    Hurricane Fly - whatever he runs in he wins

    Twitter: @Quevega

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    Senior Member krizon's Avatar
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    Martin - best suggestion winner! I like that.
    Power is good. Control is better. (Lenin)

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    Who is Martin?

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    Senior Member krizon's Avatar
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    In the same way that your name is not really Diver, neither is Irish Stamp's. You haven't been paying attention, have you, Clarence?
    Power is good. Control is better. (Lenin)

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    Senior Member an capall's Avatar
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    Irsh Stamp is not his real name? Whodda thunk it?
    "And still they gazed and still the wonder grew. That one small head could carry all he knew.

    And that small head knew that Impaire Et Passe would win the Champion Hurdle."

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    The OED will shortly be including references to Thommo in its definition of Arse. He IS the definitive Arse, the icon Arse to which budding arses aspire. He can Arse at Group Level when all the conditions are against him - eg when the world is asleep, because people have nightarses about him.
    I would open a book but only if I could bet without the fav. But then Willie the shortArse moves to odds on.
    I agree with the Arse promise displayed by Chapman but he is still wet behind the cheeks.He needs wider exposure so that we can all see what he's really got. Atr is simply not a big enough toilet.

  14. #14
    Senior Member krizon's Avatar
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    What's the BetArse s(h)ite going on him?
    Power is good. Control is better. (Lenin)

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    Turdytree to one.

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    The Arse Cup was originally devised and organised by Terry, who, sadly, no longer posts on here.

    As an Arse enthusiast myself, I have, for some time, thought about running The Arse Cup 2005 and would be delighted and honoured to do so, if I feel there is sufficient approval and interest from other forumites.

    There are plenty of new forumites who might never have witnessed top level Arse competition, so it will be a new experience for them. Having said that, for the rest of us, we will mostly be covering old ground and, let's face it, it isn't the most competitive of betting heats (I would go 1/20 Thommo, 10/1 Carson, 1000/1 Bar).

    Please share your views.

  17. #17
    Super Moderator Irish Stamp's Avatar
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    As the Arse Cup is pretty much a one horse race I would like to propose a handicap system for as mentioned above a Novembarse handicap. Say with Thommo on -20 votes, Carson -5 and Chapman on 0. This way we will be categorically say that Thommo is the biggest Arse ever as hopefully he will win off top weight so to speak and thus all will agree that he's the biggest Arse.

    Martin
    Hurricane Fly - whatever he runs in he wins

    Twitter: @Quevega

  18. #18
    Senior Member sunybay's Avatar
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    Thommo does not have rivals and if the competition were a handicap we would need a new scale because he is so far ahead in the ratings that even Carson or Chapman dont have any chance.

  19. #19
    Senior Member Harbinger's Avatar
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    Great idea Martin; a truly great weight carrying performance by Thommo will finally allow me to use my Arse-kle pun.

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